Fire of Ethics
At work you have patience for everyone. At home — not any more.
A free 30-day course: one small deed a day in ordinary life, such as a pause before a sharp word. 15–25 minutes a day; on a hard day two minutes are enough.
The first group starts on 23 November
A group is everyone who starts the course together, on the same day.
The course is an introduction to all twelve qualities. The main work comes after, in seasons: 90 days with one quality, if you wish — even for life. The whole path ↓
FreeWe sell nothingYou do not need to believe in anythingOnly you see your entries
Led by Boris Ivanashchenko. You can change your mind and leave on any day, without explanations.
It is not a marathon and not a course of lectures: nobody hurries you and nobody counts the days you miss.
What you can come with
Nine ordinary difficulties — and what you can try with each in your own day. These are not testimonials: the first group has not started yet. There are no promises: whether it works, you will see for yourself.
“I snap at my children, my grandchildren, the people close to me. Then I stand over a sleeping child and give myself my word. The next day it starts all over — and I no longer believe my own word”
We tryThree breaths before answering, first on small things: a queue, spilled tea, a request not heard for the third time.
What to watch forAt home — whether people pull their heads in when you walk in.
“I promise myself and others — and put it off for months: sport, studies, an important conversation. My daughter no longer asks me to fix her bike. She has learned not to wait”
We tryOne promise a day carried through, even a very small one.
What to watch forWhether people believe your “I’ll do it” — and whether you believe it yourself.
“The house is quiet. I call my mother — and after two minutes I don’t know what to talk about. I hang up and realise: I don’t know what she is afraid of or what she thinks about in the evenings. Forty years, and I never asked”
We tryOnce a day, ask a person about themselves, not about things, and hear them out. A neighbour or a colleague too.
What to watch forWhat people begin to tell you about.
“At night I replay the conversation: what I should have said, what he really meant. In the morning I get up exhausted — and those who have nothing to do with it get the brunt”
We tryIn the evening, write four lines about how it really was, and put the argument off until the morning.
What to watch forWhat you fall asleep with.
“I have everything: work, family, health. And inside it is empty, and there is no one to tell: people who ‘have everything’ do not complain. I catch myself simply waiting for the day to end”
We tryOne step a day towards what is truly yours, not from the urgent list.
What to watch forWhether there is at least one thing in your day that you look forward to.
“I carry everything: my husband, the children, my colleagues. I check, I redo, I remind. I am the first to tire, and I cannot let go — it feels as if without me it would all fall apart. And no one has said ‘thank you’ in a long time, only ‘you again’”
We tryHand over one task a day completely and not check on it until the deadline.
What to watch forHow many times a day you asked again and corrected.
“‘Didn’t have time’ instead of ‘forgot’. ‘Everything’s fine’ instead of the truth. Small things, every day. And then I notice that I no longer tell even myself how things are”
We tryOnce a day, say how it really was — in a small thing.
What to watch forHow many of your own words you have to keep track of.
“I start and I quit: sport, a language, a journal. Two weeks in, it all fades. The hardest part is not that — it is that once again I did not believe myself”
We tryTwo minutes of the same thing every day; after a missed day, simply come back without starting from zero.
What to watch forWhat is left after a month.
“My son closes his door; my daughter answers ‘fine’. I know their grades and their timetable — and I don’t know what hurts them. Once they ran to me with everything. Where did I lose that?”
We tryOnce a day, one question about them, not about homework — and hear them out without judging.
What to watch forWhether they come to you on their own, without being called.
What an ordinary day looks like
Everyone knows the advice “count to ten”; what is missing is daily practice. So the main thing in a day is one small deed in ordinary life: at breakfast, in the chat, in a traffic jam, at dinner. Around it are a few short supports: a question in the morning, four lines in the evening, a story for the night. You do not need to give anything up or travel anywhere.
- Woke up, coffee
- Morning, 5–10 minutesThe day card in your personal account on the site — the whole task for the day on one screen: a painting and one question. You choose a deed, and precisely a deed, not a word: not “I will be more patient”, but “at dinner I will hear my daughter out to the end”.
- The road, work, chats
- During the day — the main thingThe deed itself. For example: hold three breaths when a barb lands in the chat. Or make the call you have been putting off for a long time. Did not work out — write that down too: it is not a failure, it is how it was.
- Dinner, children, housework
- In the eveningFour lines of facts: what you noticed, what you did, what you take into tomorrow, where it got lighter. It is not a judgement of yourself, and only you see them. You can write in the diary on the site or in an ordinary notebook.
- For the nightA short story of 3–4 minutes: listen or read. A story from ordinary life, not a meditation; the names in it are different. At the end there is a small deed for tomorrow, and the next evening you write down how it went. Read the first evening in full.
- Sleep
Missed a day — do not catch up and do not count. Simply open today's card. You can come back even after a long break.
“Morning” is your morning. If you work shifts, open the card when you wake up, even after a night shift.
- Every day — one small deed in one quality: decided in the morning, done in the day, written down in the evening. 15–25 minutes, in parts.
- A hard day — two minutes. A small action from the card and one line in the evening. The day is not lost.
- Once a week — a circle, if you wish. Up to twelve people, each talks about their own day; you may stay silent. In the course — Sunday, 19:00–20:30 Moscow time, a video chat in the group’s Telegram group.
The circle: how it works
The circle: not a confession and not a lesson
The circle is a video chat in your group’s Telegram chat, from your phone or computer. To take part you need Telegram and an email address (to log in to your account and receive the letters); if you do not have one of them, set it up before the start — it is free and takes a few minutes. In the circle each person talks for a few minutes about their day, the others listen. Nobody gives advice unasked and nobody corrects anyone. You share as much as you want, and you may stay silent for all thirty days; camera optional. You can skip the circle. The leader keeps time and makes sure everyone feels safe. The leader is not a teacher, does not hand out advice and does not see your entries.
How the 30-day course works and what comes after
Two weeks of small deeds without theory. From Day 15 — the same qualities by name, short quotations in the cards from the books the programme rests on, and a longer passage in the circle. Which books these are — you can look right now →
- Days 1–14small deeds, no theory
- Day 15the names of the qualities you practised
- Days 16–30the same qualities by name; short quotations from the books in the cards; a calm summary
a Sunday circle, if you wish; from Day 15 people take turns reading a short passage in it, and you can still stay silent
What comes after the course — if you wish
- Day 1try it without signing up
- The 30-day courseone small deed a day; a circle on Sundays, if you wish; then a two-week break
- The Wheelabout 20 minutes: for each of the 12 qualities — was there a deed; choose one
- A season of one quality90 days with your own group, a circle once a week
- Two light weeksone small deed a day — the minimum, no circle
- The Wheel again → a new season → … for as long as you like — for life, if you wish. Every season works the same way; only the quality changes. You can stop at any moment.
- If you wish, before a new Wheel — the 30-day course again with the nearest group, to refresh all twelve qualities. Our advice: at least once a year. After it, the Wheel and the season follow that group’s dates.
If you go one after another — up to three seasons a year. Free at every step.
The qualities include patience, honesty, gratitude, trust, humaneness, equilibrium and others. The whole list and the map of all thirty days are open; you do not need to sign up to see them.
What is certain — and what you check yourself
- Time. 15–25 minutes a day, two minutes on a hard day. The circle is an hour and a half on Sunday evening, if you wish (in Russian for now); without it the course is still complete.
- For certain. Each morning, a card with one small deed; in the evening, four lines of facts; on Day 30, all your entries at once. After that, if you wish, a review of your own deeds (the Wheel) and seasons of one quality. All of it is free.
- What will change, we do not promise: only your entries show it. In the morning rush, did you catch the second before a harsh word? Did you carry a promise through? Did you hear your child out without interrupting?
What you will have after 30 days
- Thirty evenings of notes about what actually happened. They are yours alone.
- On Day 30 you reread them all at once and see for yourself what holds even on a hard day and what you did for others.
- If you wish — a view from outside: one person close to you answers briefly, at the start of the course and three months later, what they have noticed. Only you see the answer.
- An introduction to all twelve qualities. Growing one of them comes next — in a season, if you wish.
No promises: you compare yourself only with yourself. How you will see your progress →
Who stands behind this
Boris Ivanashchenko
founder and leader of the first groups
Who I am. I have two daughters. I manage large IT projects, and I am used to a simple rule: if it isn’t written down, it didn’t happen.
What held me. In September 2025 my wife Yulia died. That year what held me was not big decisions but small deeds: a pause before answering, four lines in the evening about what actually happened, one small deed for another person. I gathered such deeds into thirty days so that others could have the same support.
What I do here. I lead the first groups myself. I answer every sign-up personally, within two days. I am not a guru and not a teacher. I promise no results. What I offer is an honest order to the day, and people beside you with whom you don’t have to pretend.
Why the programme is dedicated to Yulia · The project’s principles and what we never do · Email for any questions: hello@ogonetiki.ru
Why it is free, and will it stay that way
You cannot sell a person to themselves. So everything is free: the course and whatever comes after it — now, in a month and in a year. Nothing opens for money.
0 ₽ — now and later
Now
We do not accept money at all until a non-profit organisation with an open report is registered. I pay for the domain and hosting myself. You can help with a deed: tell one person who needs this practice about it.
Later
After a completed step — the course or a season — we will ask once whether you would like to say thank you. It is a voluntary gift, not a fee, and it has no effect on taking part: saying “no” changes nothing, and we will not ask a second time for that step. Money only once there is a non-profit: then a gift can go to the project, to the founder or to your own leader.
Never
No paid levels, no “bring a friend”, no commissions and no “last chance” letters.
Saying thank you gives neither status nor privileges: everything stays equally free both for those who did and for those who did not.
What it stands on
“Fire of Ethics” is the name of the whole programme. Ethics is how we are with people. Fire — because it holds only while you keep it up every day.
The programme rests on books of the Russian philosophical and ethical tradition that are open to everyone. Which books these are — you can look right now →
These books are not about mysteries but about what gets in the way of living at home and at work. Here is one line from them — about how to look at people:
“One must look at all that is good through a glass that doubles it, and make imperfection ten times smaller; otherwise you will stay as you were.”
What comes from the books and what is ours
- From the books — direction and meaning: which qualities to grow and why. You can check the meaning of each quality against them yourself.
- Ours — the structure: the 30-day course, the 90-day seasons, circles of up to twelve people, the timing, the order of the days, the two-minute minimum. This is our working decision, not the words of the tradition.
- The advice the course gives from Day 15: begin the morning with a warm thought of a person whose advice helped you live better — your mother, a teacher, a friend, the author of a book. Whom to think of is up to you; you can also leave this advice aside.
- A painting every morning — a work by the artist Nicholas Roerich: a minute to take a closer look. You do not need to know anything about it, and you can skip it.
- For believers: the programme is about deeds in an ordinary day, not about faith. If you have your own morning prayer or rule, there is no need to change it. More in the answer to “Is this a religion?” below.
Questions people ask before signing up
We answer plainly. If your question is not here, write to me — I will answer myself.
What if I miss a day, if every day is hard for me, or if I give up?
A missed day is not made up: simply come back to today’s card. For hard days there is a two-minute minimum — a small action from the card and one line in the evening. If that is all you manage, it is still practice, not failure. You can leave on any day without explanations, and you can come back too. If you were writing in the group chat or coming to the circle and then disappeared, the leader will write once and will not bother you again. Those who chose silence from the start are not written to at all.
How will I know that something is changing?
By deeds — not by feelings and not by scores. The course lasts 30 days: every evening you write four lines of facts — the last one about where it got lighter today — and on Day 30 you reread them all at once. After that, only if you wish: on Day 45, the Wheel — was there a deed for each quality in the last two weeks; 90 days after the course began, a short view from outside — someone close to you, whom you ask yourself, says what they have noticed. And on the anniversary of the first day of your course, “A year ago” opens on your “My path” page: your entries from the first week and your letter to yourself, a year ahead, if you wrote one — on Day 30 or later. You compare yourself only with yourself. How you will see your progress →
Who sees my entries, and what happens to my data?
Only you see your entries. The group leader sees neither your evening lines nor your Wheel — this is closed off in the platform itself. The leader sees only your mark for the week (how it went: good, hard…), if you set one, and an overall summary of the questionnaires without names — once there are at least five. The questionnaires are short surveys at the start and on a few checkpoint days, if you wish: they test whether the course itself works, not you. To sign up, a name and a way to reach you are enough; to sign in to your account you need an email address. The data is stored on a server in Russia; we do not sell it or pass it to advertising networks, and at your request we delete it together with all your entries. Or you can simply write in a paper notebook. More about your data →
Things are very hard for me right now. Is this for me?
Perhaps — the two-minute minimum exists for days like these. But this is not treatment. It is a practice of attention and behaviour, not psychotherapy: in severe grief or anxiety it does not replace a specialist’s help. If you cannot sleep, cannot eat or get out of bed, if your own thoughts frighten you, see a doctor or call a crisis line in your country. In an emergency, call your local emergency number (112 in Europe and in Russia). This is a normal, grown-up step. If you are already in therapy or have a diagnosis, the course neither replaces nor cancels your work with a specialist: take the practices in a manageable amount — the daily minimum is enough — and if something gets in the way, tell your leader. And in the circle you can simply be among people and say nothing.
Is this a religion? I am a believer — will it get in the way?
No. The programme is not tied to any religion and does not replace one. Nobody prays here, there are no rituals, and nobody asks you to believe in anything: we look at deeds in an ordinary day. If you have your own morning prayer or rule, there is no need to change it: the programme is about deeds, not about faith. We do not argue about faith. You can skip the morning painting, like any advice of the course, and you do not have to agree with the books it rests on. If you want to check in advance whether it conflicts with your faith, here are the books.
Is this a sect?
No. But check it by the signs, not by our word. A sect usually gives itself away by money, secret knowledge, a guru, pressure not to leave and distancing from loved ones. Compare us with them. We take no money for taking part. There is no secret knowledge: the map of all 30 days is open on the site, and the books the programme rests on are open to everyone. There is no guru: the leader only keeps time and makes sure everyone feels safe. You can leave on any day without explanations, and stay silent for all thirty days. And every deed of the course is turned towards your family, colleagues and neighbours: the course leads you to your own people, not away from them. The 30-day map → Which books these are →
Start with one day
It is worth starting not with a decision to change your life, but with one Tuesday lived a little more attentively. If the first day turned out to be yours, sign up for the group.
The first group in brief
- Start — 23 November, then 30 days in a row. The whole group begins on the same day.
- 12 places in a group — one circle, where everyone is known by name. We start if at least eight people join; if fewer have signed up by 16 November, we will move the start, and I will write to each of you in advance with the new date — your place stays yours. If more than twelve sign up, we open a second group on the same dates, with its own circle on Sunday at 17:00. If there are not enough places there either, I will put you down for the next group, which starts on 8 February 2027.
- It is the first one: there are no results yet; together we are checking whether the method works. I ask for honest feedback, including about what did not work, and short questionnaires — they test the method, not you.
- To join — your name and where to reply: email, Telegram or phone. I answer myself, within two days. To take part you need email and Telegram; if you do not have one of them, set it up before the start — it is free. Participation from the age of 18.